Goals...CHECK!

So Jake's goals were done...it was time to finish mine and Morgan's.  I went ahead and let Abby and Claire off the hook with goals this time around.  Their newest thing is jobs.  They are currently working on learning to make their bed, tidy their room, and tidy their toys each day.  I figure that is enough for now.  Maybe when summer comes, they won't be so lucky. ;)


We will start with Morgan's.  Her "Take 2 - Goal Setting" session was not near as dramatic as Jake's (see previous post), but it was nice just to sit down with her and give her a chance to make goals for herself.  It was interesting that most of the goals she picked were ones that I had previously mentioned.  Being a child that is always trying to please her parents I am sure this is no accident. :)  But she seems invested in them so I guess it doesn't really matter "who" came up with the ideas right?  The point being that she feels invested and is taking ownership of the goals.  This ownership will spark her desire to work to accomplish them...we hope. :)  So here she is thinking,  writing, and decorating her poster...

Proudly choosing the perfect spot to hang it in her room so that she can see it each day...(not the place I would have picked, but it's her room not mine. :) )

And the finished product...ready to be worked on. :)  

Keep in mind that these are not goals for the year (as previously determined in goal-setting session #1) but just until school gets out at the end of May.  We just thought that the full year would be too long for them to feel the joy of progress.  So we switched it to be the goals they wanted to accomplish by summer.  Then once summer hits we will do summer goals to work on while they are home all the time.  Hopefully this will keep them busy working, accomplishing, and self-confidence building in their abilities to do hard things. :)  That's the real "goal."


Ok, on to me.  I originally set some goals for myself as well in the "first session" but then read some fantastic insight shared by other amazing women on other amazing blogs about how they were approaching their 2012 year.  They talked about how they would choose ONE word to focus on all year long.  This particular word would need to encompass all the things they wanted to become better at and accomplish in that time, but it would also serve as a sort of grounding stone for them in their day-to-day lives.  It would be in the back of their minds always to help them in every role they were in, whether it be mother, wife, sister, friend, daughter, neighbor, etc.  I thought about this philosophy a lot.  It seemed to me that this approach would help me a lot more at this point in my life when I wasn't really looking to "do" more, just "be" more.  So with a lot of thought, and a little teasing from my honey, I starting trying to come up with ONE word to be my anchor this year.  This was actually a lot harder than I thought.  I thought it would be easier to come up with one word, rather than set specific goals...not so.  It was actually a lot harder because this ONE word had to incorporate progress in just about every aspect of my life!  Where do you even start?!
A lot of words came to mind:
Listen
Lift
Purify
Love
etc.
But the more I thought about what I really needed to improve upon in my life, and what brings me down faster than anything else, the more I was led to "my" word.  And this is it...

"Positive"

For those of you who know me, you would probably be a little surprised at this word (or at least I hope you would :)).  But I have realized something about myself over the last few months.  I can get pretty negative.  I think this stems from the environment I grew up in.  It was pretty negative a lot of the time. So I think I have the natural tendency to look for what is wrong or needs to be fixed with everything.  I think this CAN be a good thing...after all, progress comes from evaluation and adaptation.  But what I have realized myself doing lately is getting negative about things I CAN'T change.  All this does is bring me down.  No progress, just depressing.  There are some days where I feel like a little black cloud is following me around.  I am grumpy.  I get snappy.  I am far less patient with those I love.  That feeling permeates my home and family.  I feel it.  They feel it.  And sometimes it is pretty hard to snap out of.  Don't get me wrong, I am not depressed or anything, but I get tired, frustrated, and just plain grouchy.  I HATE feeling this way.  I have often wondered why I have those days...in talking to other moms I understand that it is pretty normal, but I wanted to find a way to combat it instead of just giving into it.  I still have my agency in any situation I am in, so I know that it was certainly my choice to allow myself to feel this way...but how do I change that???  These have been my thoughts for quite some time now.


Then those inspired women, on their inspired blogs, and an inspired friend, who led me to an inspired First Presidency message, by an inspired prophet of God, culminating in a trip here;

inspired ME to look outside of the box. To find a principle rather than a tactic.  This little journey of self-discovery led me to find my word...and the answer I had been praying for.  The answer is "POSITIVE."  It is be positive.  Have a positive attitude regardless of the situation or position I am in.  Be positive with and about other people.  LOOK for the GOOD!  When I start thinking and speaking negatively it just brings me down.  Makes me feel bad and my attitude toward everything, and everyone else in my life is affected.  When I am positive about myself, my abilities, my situation, my trials, my aspirations, and others around me, I am better.  I am happier.  I am more grateful.  I am more compassionate.  I love more.  I feel more.  I notice more.  I am a better mother.  I am a better wife.  I am better at my church calling, and every other role I play.  


So this year, my word is "POSITIVE."  This word will be set in the back of my mind all year to remind me of the joy that I miss when I allow negative emotions to take over my thoughts and feelings.  It's going to be a good year...and if it is not, then I will be CHOOSE to be POSITIVE about whatever may come.  :)


Thanks for listening.


Ps. My husband decided his "word" would be DOMINATE! :)  He loves to tease me. :)